The Saddle Club Episode 1.1: The Saddle Club

In my humble opinion, The Saddle Club is quintessential horse girl media - you just can't discuss the genre without it. I was completely obsessed with The Saddle Club as a kid. I had the books, the backpack, and the board game. As a kid, I thought the show was so grown up. I desperately wanted to be like Carole, Lisa, and Stevie, and have horsey adventures on my own. (Now that I'm approaching 30, the girls' adventures don't seem fun, they seem to indicate a worrying lack of adult supervision.) So I think it's appropriate that my first review here is for the show that really set me off on the path to becoming a  horse girl: The Saddle Club!

The series opens with Stevie and Carole out riding Comanche and Starlight, respectively. I know I’m officially in ancient dinosaur territory when my initial thoughts watching this scene is no longer ‘Horses! I want one!’ but, ‘Gosh the scenery is stunning, that property must be worth a fortune!’ Stevie notes that Comanche’s particularly energetic, and thinks a gallop will help him calm down. We then cut to Lisa and her mother in the car. Lisa is unenthusiastic about having riding lessons, but her mother asks, ‘You want to meet the right kind of people, don’t you?’ Personally, I don’t think most eleven-year-olds need to be too concerned with their networking prospects, but what do I know? I’m not a mother to children, only to cats. When Stevie and Carole ride out onto the driveway, Mrs. Atwood nearly runs them over. Instead of apologising for the fact she almost committed vehicular manslaughter and, you know, nearly killed a child, she proceeds to jump out of her car and start screaming at them. I’m pretty sure that this, given the show was filmed in 2001, means Mrs. Atwood might be one of history's first Karens? Stevie gives as good as Mrs. Atwood gets, and shouts that she should learn how to drive while Carole gives her and Lisa the biggest greasy imaginable, both of which are objectively hilarious. 

We’re then introduced to Max (looking dreamy in a navy sweater) and Mrs. Reg. Mrs. Atwood talks up Lisa’s implied to be non-existent riding skills to them, and insists she should be put in the intermediate class. Now, in my opinion, wanting your beginner child in an intermediate class seems like a recipe for disaster, but Max, in what is perhaps the only time he actively prevents an accident happening at Pine Hollow, senses what’s up and later tells Lisa that she can ride on Patch, a ‘push-button’ (i.e. bombproof, beginner-friendly) pony. Now if only he had the good sense to try intervene against the MANY OTHER PREVENTABLE ACCIDENTS that occur at the business he runs during the rest of the series … #justiceforcobalt

Speaking of children being injured at Pine Hollow, Lisa’s phone goes off during the group riding lesson, causing Comanche to spook and Stevie to fall. Afterwards, Lisa feels guilty, but Veronica hilariously deadpans, ‘Wah! Wah!’ which is perhaps the first inkling we get at her cavalier attitude towards death. (I'll  be keeping a running tally of ‘Times Veronica Attempted to Straight-up Murder the Saddle Club’ during my reviews.)

More things happen. Veronica screeches at her mother about wanting a cell phone, and, in what is probably the first recorded instance of gentle parenting, her mother immediately acquiesces. We then jump to Carole and Stevie, the latter of whom is explaining that she can no longer afford to go on the upcoming Mountain Trail Overnight ride because she bought a ‘really cool’ t-shirt. Just how much was this t-shirt, anyway? Surely, unless Stevie was shopping at Gucci, one t-shirt is not the cost of an overnight horse riding camp? Stevie’s new plan is to sell cookies and say it’s for charity, Carole (rightfully) points out that this is illegal. (We will also be keeping a running tally of ‘Crimes Committed by the Saddle Club.’) 

Lisa attempts to apologise to Stevie and Carole, which segues into her complaining about her mother. Carole looks morose, Stevie explains that Carole’s mother has passed away. Lisa is appropriately mortified — you do feel for her in this episode. It’s just one social blunder after another. 

Veronica hatches her latest attempted murder plot totally harmless prank against Stevie and Carole. She sneaks her pager under Comanche’s saddle blanket, and gleefully announces to Lisa that she’s going to use her new phone to buzz the pager while Stevie is out on a trail ride. Lisa is horrified, but Veronica threatens to have Lisa kicked off the Mountain Trail Overnight if she blabs. However, Lisa runs to Carole, and they jump onto Starlight together, and race out to save Stevie on the trial ride. You know what happens, this is a kids’ show. Veronica buzzes her pager, Comanche begins freaking out, Max (the adult who is supervising the trail ride and legally responsible for them) kind of just … watches from a distance and does nothing, Lisa and Carole save the day, yadda yadda … Fun times! 

Back at Pine Hollow, Veronica angrily blasts Lisa for ruining her murder attempt silly, impish prank. Lisa asks Veronica if she was trying to kill Stevie, to which Veronica responds with, ‘You are so finished at this stable!’ which is … definitely avoiding answering the question! I tell ya, that girl is going to make a great politician one day … if she manages to keep dodging murder charges. (I’m kidding. Veronica’s rich! She’ll never see a day of jail in her life! #commentary)

Max seems to be aware that something went down between the four girls, but they collectively decide not to tell him what actually happened, which is definitely not at all setting a precedent of Veronica doing dangerous shit at the stables and facing no consequences for it. Not at all! Max tells Lisa that Stevie and Carole explained how she saved the day, and that she’s welcome on the Mountain Trail Overnight. He also gives her a Pine Hollow t-shirt which is quite endearing. Aww, Max. He would be such a sweetheart if not for the ever-increasingly high rates of child endangerment occurring at his place of business!  The episode ends with the girls riding down the picturesque driveway of Pine Hollow, deciding that they shall be … the Saddle Club. (Title drop!) Roll credits.

Running Tallies:

Times Veronica Attempted to Straight-up Murder the Saddle Club: One time, soon to be one of many … (cue villainous music.)

Crimes Committed by the Saddle Club: Technically zero, although Stevie did seem pretty committed to committing charity fraud before Carole … reined her in. (See what I did there? #horsepun) Stevie and Carole also sort of blackmail Veronica into shutting up about kicking Lisa off the Mountain Trail Overnight, but given that she did try to murder Stevie, I’d say the blackmail is cancelled out.